From Lydia, 24 March 2008:
Your story about the darlin' li'l chick who became an unholy terror reminded me of a somewhat less dramatic Easter gift when I was a child.
Someone gave my sisters and me three cute little yellow fuzzy ducklings. We kept them in a warm box in the kitchen and named them Huey, Duey, and Louie after the cartoon characters. I was fascinated by their softness and little baby-quacks as they pottered busily about, or cuddled together to sleep. Unlike your li'l chick, they grew into quite lovely large white ducks — but one day we noticed something kind of strange about Louie: he had laid a couple of eggs! After a family conference, we agreed we'd need to change his name to Louise.
And, since we were city folk, not long thereafter the ducks were adopted by a nearby farmer who had better facilities for large ducks.
From Jim M, 22 March 2008:
My Favorite Malapropism from My Own Neighborhood:
She had lost a lot of weight, I thought on purpose, since she had been somewhat chubby. I complimented her, and she responded — "Well, I had two teeth abstracted and I've lost so much weight that I'm beginning to look emancipated."